When Marriage and Business Collide: Leading with Love and Courage

He’s built a wildly successful business in the past, possibly even generated millions. But now he’s pivoting into a different industry, and it’s been one of the hardest transitions of his life.

Why? His wife has struggled to support the pivot. She didn’t believe he was making the right call. That tension hit home for me.

I remember working full-time at Apple, running a struggling vape business online, and deciding to drive for Lyft and Uber on the side. My wife said, "You’re not doing that. I don’t agree with it."

And I told her, "I’m not asking for your permission. I’m asking for your input."

I knew deep down that I had to make that decision. It caused temporary tension in our marriage, but it was the right call. And in the end, she respected me more for it.

What Headship Really Means

This may trigger some of you, and that’s okay. But I believe the Bible is still relevant today. As a man, you are the head of your home—not in dominance or ego, but in servant leadership.

Being the head doesn’t mean barking orders or acting superior. It means you take responsibility. You provide. You protect. You lead with humility, just as Jesus laid down His life for the church.

There will be times you and your wife disagree, and when those moments come, someone has to make the final call. Two captains will sink a ship. If you’re always yielding just to avoid conflict, that’s not leadership—that’s fear.

And no, this isn’t about ignoring your wife. Listen to her. Learn from her. Many times, her wisdom will outmatch yours. But when you know you must act, lead with clarity.

When Respect Follows Leadership

The Craftsman client eventually made his move. His wife stayed on the sidelines for a while. But as he led with quiet confidence, she began to see the fruit. She started supporting him.

Then something unexpected happened. He found himself surrounded by extremely wealthy people—yachts, mansions, supercars. He felt small. Discouraged. Like he was behind.

He told me, "I need a breakthrough."

I told him: "You’re judging too soon. What if this is God’s breakthrough? What if this is how He’s refining you before the big blessing?"

We forget that sometimes the greatest riches are found in the fire. God may be preparing your heart so that when the financial success comes, you’ll be wise enough to handle it.

When the Pain Is Real, But So Is God

Just a few days ago, I was in the hospital—an enlarged spleen, internal bleeding, a blazing fever, and the worst headache I’ve ever had. Even morphine couldn’t touch it.

In that moment, I had a choice: believe that God was against me or believe that God was refining me. I chose the latter.

Pain without purpose is agony. Pain with purpose is formation.

But when your spouse doesn’t support you in that pain? It cuts twice as deep. That’s why mutual support matters.

Real Conflict = Real Marriage

Conflict doesn’t mean your marriage is broken. It means it’s real.

A man once told me that after 30 years, his wife just got up and left him for another man. They had teenage kids. It was heartbreaking.

"We never fought," he told me.

That marriage was paper-thin. No depth. No growth. Real relationships require friction, resolution, and mutual transformation.

Don’t Confuse Pleasing with Loving

Many men chase the phrase: "Happy wife, happy life."

I hate that line. Your marriage should not revolve around your wife. It should revolve around Jesus Christ. When both spouses pursue Him, they naturally grow closer to each other.

You are called to love your wife, not to please her in every moment. Trying to make her constantly happy is a burden only God can carry.

And she’s not your project. She’s your partner.

When you come to a decision point and can’t agree, don’t be a coward. Don’t be a bully. Be a servant-leader.

Make a Decision and Move Forward

A wrong decision made in faith is better than no decision made in fear. God is gracious. He can course correct.

Proverbs 16:9 says, "The mind of man plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps."

If your car isn’t moving, it can’t be steered. Move.

Build your business. Grow your marriage. Be okay with mid-course corrections as God guides and refines you.

Jesus Modeled Both Roles

Jesus exemplified both headship and submission. He leads the church like a husband should lead his wife. He submitted to the Father like a wife submits to her husband.

That model brings beauty, balance, and glory to God.

You will suffer. You will struggle. You will feel kicked in the teeth. But God is growing you. Someday, you’ll look back and say: It was worth it.

Even if your faith feels tiny right now, like a mustard seed—that’s enough. Jesus said it can move mountains.

Be a man. Make the decision. Lead. Serve. Love.

And trust God with the outcome.